Wednesday, September 5, 2007

Taking My Own "MOM ADVICE"


Now why is it that I can’t take my OWN “MOM ADVICE”? The giving advice NOT the getting advice. The advice that I give as a "MOM" to my nine-year-old daughter Sabrina Denise Raftery.

Sabrina came in the house very upset from playing outside with her little buddy Ashley. Sabrina and Ashley are both entering fourth grade (different schools Sabrina attends a private Catholic School), same age, same body types - thin and tall, same long brown hair, same brown eyes (although Sabrina’s eyes change to green in the light), same clothing styles, and they even like the same boys - well twin boys – Sabrina likes Jacob (Jake) and Ashley likes Noah.

Sabrina disappointedly announces “ASHLEY DOESN’T LIKE ME ANYMORE” (!) as if this was the end of her world – well for her it was - at that moment...

In my mind I am half gritting my teeth and half chuckling while I am saying to myself “Oh, here we go again”. I’ve heard this many times before and I began to I offer advice in my motherly voice. “OK…What Happened”? “Well”…Sabrina reluctantly begins with her eyes looking down to describe what happened...of course it has to do with Ashley and the Twins.

I try to be supportive as I explain to Sabrina that she needs to “SHAKE these incidents off”. Then I add, “Don’t worry about who you CAN’T hang out with FOCUS on who you CAN hang out with”.

She thinks about this and looks out the window as she is holding our cat Soccer (yes Soccer is black and white) and moments later we hear another friend of hers Joshua calling up to our third floor window. “Sabrina can you come out and play”?

That is all Sabrina needs to hear ... life begins again...Off Sabrina goes...after kissing Soccer and leaving her on the window sill...But not before I remind her to “Take the trash with her and toss it in the dumpster”.

Then as I am in the kitchen preparing Sabrina’s favorite dinner (pasta) and a few frozen chocolate chip cookies…it hits me. I chuckle out loud and say to Soccer who is now at my feet - “Why couldn’t I have taken my OWN “MOM ADVICE” last week after seeing a guy that I like holding another woman’s hand”?

Hmmm all those opportunities I missed. I would have saved myself sooo much grief if I was not so worried about who I COULDN’T hang out with instead of FOCUSING on who I could hang out with.

Imagine...I too thought it was the "end of the world"...well for that moment it was (!)…

Thanks Sabrina for helping me learn "LIFE’S LESSONS" from just being your MOM !!

(Now if only I too had another gentleman calling for me at my window ! wink)


Abel Goddard said...

And don't forget to KNOW who you're spending time with. Charlie Tremendous Jones says we are the books we read and the people we hang out with - or, as Proverbs 13:20 says, "He that is walking with wise persons will become wise, but he that is having dealings with the stupid ones will fare badly."

Ryan said...

Sherri: A line from the poet Wordsworth came to mind as I read your blog post: "The Child is father of the Man." Or, perhaps, "The Child is mother of the Woman" would be a better fit! (See the poem here:
It's funny how when we look into the lives of others, the right response to a given situation can seem so self-evident. But when the circumstances are in our own lives, our vision can get so clouded!